Cosmo sex tip #339
When your partner just isn’t doing the trick, try telling him “Seriously, Christ will come before I do.” And see how he reacts.
hot things to say during sex:
- dang son
- bless you
- yabba dabba doo
- your own name
- heil hitler
- gnarly to the max!
- how dare you
- oh well
- i’m sorry. i’m so so sorry
trust me these work 100% i had the sex once
Sex is not a goddamn performance. Sex should feel as natural as drinking water. It should not require confidence.
Sex should happen, because the moment is ripe. Ripening lips, ripening labia, ripening cock, ripening pupils, ripening state of being. Ripe and augmented and brimming. Your energy goes to your pumping heart, then to every external nerve, then to theirs, on fire.
You bask, roll, play in it. You sigh, moan, laugh. It’s not about being ‘good in bed.’ It’s about being happy.
One should never worry if they’re doing it ‘correctly.’ Sex is not factual. I don’t want your cookie-cutter sex, I don’t want your meticulously crafted, calculated, fool-proof fuck. I don’t want a show. I want you. Let your instincts, urges and whims define that. It’s enough.
What do most girls like? Forget about it. Statistics are meaningless when there’s only one. Hello, here’s me. Here’s you. Don’t worry about taking it too slow. We got time. We got infinite rhythms, combinations, possibilities. Explore each fuck. Take our time. We can do a different one later.
Don’t worry about making me come. I’m here. Right where I want to be. I am overwhelmed by wanting; you don’t have to convince me. I want you because I like you. So don’t put on a front. Don’t taint this.
I’m frustrated—it’s just authenticity I want. It’s originality. It’s passion. It’s joy. Don’t say that something I like is ugly. Don’t compare yourself to the rest. You will live and die with and within your experiences like everyone else. If someone thinks you are amazing, they are not wrong. Their universe is as real as any other; it is forged through perception.
I don’t care if you accidentally slammed my head into the wall, if you slipped out, if my arm cracked, if the delightful pressure of your wet lips on my anything made a silly sound. There is no right way and no wrong way.
‘Good in bed,’ what. You’re good in my bed. I’m pleased you’re there. I feel it suits you. Shove your technique. Let your memory swallow it. Fuck me like you’d fuck me, fuck me like you feel. This isn’t a test.
I do not feel good. I’ve got the sad sads. All I want to do is fuck you.
Sex without love is as hollow and ridiculous as love without sex.
Skin is designed to warm other skin. England is a cold country and when somebody touches you, you feel warmer. We are animals, and this is what we do, the cold calling of one body to another. Sometimes you just need somebody’s arm to catch on the small of your back, to brush against your neck … you are a whole person, made of flesh and bone and invisible histories, and notches on bedposts don’t rub off on your skin.
…Before I give my body, I must give my thoughts, my mind, my dreams. And you weren’t having any of those.
I wanted to crawl into her chest and kiss everything that she’d thought I’d hate.